I read one time that one of the keys to happiness is always having something to look forward to. Turns out, there are many keys, much deeper, according to this book that I have mentioned.
Several people have been telling me that I am such an inspiration because I am always looking for the positive side of life. I would be lying if I didn't admit it is flattering, however it only seems natural to me. Why would anyone want to dwell, much less investigate, the negative? I honestly don't feel that I deserve much credit just because I want to be happy.
One step towards that is my ability to choose the people I associate with, the TV and movies I watch, and plain and simply, what I think about. Certainly I can't ignore problems of the world or of my friends, but I can choose to focus on helping and being a good listener whenever possible.
So the book is "The Art Of Happiness" by Howard Cutler and His Holiness The Dalai Lama. It is not a review of religion at all, but rather thoughts on what brings happiness. Each page is filled with so much inspiration that I have to go back several times and reread them. It has taken me quite awhile just to get through 50 pages.
Here are a few of my favorite highlights . . . .
The purpose of our existence is to seek happiness. It is not self-centered or self-indulgent. Happy people are generally more sociable, flexible and creative. And most important, they are found to be more loving and forgiving. They have a quality of openness, and willingness to reach out to others.
Happiness is determined more by one's state of mind than by external events. Success can bring temporary elation, or tragedy can cause depression, but eventually happiness migrates back to a certain baseline. Lottery winners, on one extreme, and those struck by a major illness, on the other extreme, both were found to return to their usual range of moment-to-moment happiness.
Our feelings of contentment are strongly influenced by our tendency to compare. Who is smarter, more beautiful, or more successful? Once our basic needs are met, " . . . we don't need more money, we don't need greater success or fame, we don't need the perfect body or even the perfect mate -- right now, at this very moment, we have a mind, which is all the basic equipment we need to achieve complete happiness."
"The greater the level of calmness of our mind, the greater our peace of mind, the greater our ability to enjoy a happy and joyful life."
Many people confuse happiness with pleasure, such as the touch of a loved one, sex, a hot bath, a beautiful sunset . . . . or other extremes of cocaine, heroin, alcohol, or a winning streak in Las Vegas.
And lastly, and this is my favorite,
"If you maintain a feeling of compassion, loving kindness, then something automatically opens your inner door. Through that, you can communicate much more easily with other people. And that feeling of warmth creates a kind of openness. You'll find that all human beings are just like you, so you'll be able to relate to them more easily."
2 comments:
Two simple thoughts. Money buys stuff,not happiness. Relationships are happiness. A wealthy friend of mine asked me what my favorite thing was. I said sitting next to the fire, having a cup of coffee and laughing and talking with the man I love. She then told me that she never had closeness with anyone. I said that I hope that will change.
Another thought about being positive is Abraham Lincoln, saying " If you look for the bad in mankind, you will surely find it."
I think it is that way with so much in life. We all choose how we look at life. I want to look at life through Bill's beautiful eyes. Reading his blogs, helps me.
Amy Lowell:
Happiness: We rarely feel it.
I would buy it, beg it, steal it,
Pay in coins of dripping blood
For this one transcendent good.
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